Song playing: Ay-Yo – Scratch Track
Aloha!
I do not know how the devil she did it, but she did.
I had written to her just before my run, and then again when I came back quickly to tell her I had been back.
Her reply was short, but it made me feel a million times better. The run definitely helped, but she brought the rest of it back around.
I feel… good.
She raised a bunch of questions, marking that there would be no changing my whiteness, and also pointing out that someday I would have half white kids. And that they would look to me as a role model for half of who they are.
This caught me completely off guard. I had no idea what to say to this.
You see, inside me, I do not feel white. Everything that the culture stands for, everything that stereotypes the Caucasian race; I don’t fit with. At least not internally. I don’t feel white. Inside me is a Native American boy raised on a reservation ghetto.
I need to think about it a lot more, but she’s helping me come to grips with it. I need to talk to God about it. I think like a Naskapi, but look like a whiteman.
Perhaps my seeing the white race from an outsiders perspective will help.
The problems this country and many others have with race is far from over; and anyone who thinks they are are fooling themselves.
Anyone who thinks that things are alright hasn’t seen the other side. I’ve lived on the other side of the line between whites and Native Americans. I’m learning more and more about the problems that face the minorities of this country today.
I really can’t wait to be back to campus.