Song currently playing: Rage Against the Machine – Calm like a Bomb
Oie.
So, all the freshman International Students arrived this week.
And, the majority of them are girls.
And, since I’ve been hanging out with Inya and Setti, the word is spreading fast that I’m a nice guy.
NOT that that’s a bad thing, BUT there are a short supply of guys here, and those that are here are either very very immature; or not interested in girls at all. AND, since Valerie asked me my age last night; it’s spreading fast that though I’m a senior, I’m only a year older than the freshmen. 😛
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining… 😛
But it does get me awfully confused.
It’s hard for me, because when I have this many female friends, I get paranoid. It gets harder and harder to tell which attitudes are friendly and which are looking for something deeper. At the same time, I can tell a certain number of them are getting deeper and it gets me scared because I don’t want to hurt any of them.
I feel at times I’m not paying enough attention to some of them. And then when I do, I feel like I spending too much time with them and not with someone else.
I end up retreating to secluded places by myself to think; but invariably one of them finds me in the now-labeled “romantic” spot and then I get drawn into conversations with them.
I don’t think it’s wrong, its simply that I don’t know most of them enough to get this deep. But at the same time, I don’t want to scare them off in hopes that perhaps they might be the PERFECT person to get deep with.
So, for now, I’m doing my best to remain as friends, but with a friendship so deep as might be accustomed by a trusted confidant (which to many I already am).
My only resolution is to keep watching and be very considerate of who I choose to make deeper friends with.